One Over the Eight

I think these signs at the top of the street have been celebrating a little too early!

It's nearly that time of year again. I've just been out for a walk in the rain (with brolly) and thoroughly enjoyed it; time for thinking and watching the little rivulets of water running down the hill into the village by passing all the gutters still blocked with leaves. Fortunately, we are well above sea level here but the ground is saturated and even my garden has pools of water on it.


There isn't much preparation for Christmas, we're breaking with a fifty year plus tradition and this year, we're having steak instead of turkey which I am so looking forward to. Boxing Day consists of being with family and a short visit to a friend to say hello in the morning. Sadly, back at work on the 27th but as most people take Christmas off, the phone and e-mail should be very quiet until the New Year!

I haven't done a list for many months and I thought I'd do one that's seasonal and relates to the financial position at home - certainly mine! 

10 things that tell you you've overspent at Christmas:

1. American Express calls and says; "Definitely leave home without it."
2. Your idea of a 7 course meal is taking a deep breath outside a restaurant.
3. You think of a lottery ticket as an investment.
4. You give blood everyday, just for the cup of tea and biscuit.
5. You finally clean your house, hoping to find loose change.
6. McDonalds supplies you with all your kitchen condiments.
7. The wolf sends you food parcels.
8. You go back for seconds at communion.
9. Dried turkey is all you have for the twelve days of Christmas.
10. You rob Peter and then you rob Paul.

I hope you have a great Christmas, if you don't celebrate it - the seasons greetings to you.

Chat soon

Ta-ra

I've Had an Idea, Dear...

My cat bought a bird in the house today, sadly already dead although not a mark on it - I guess shock got the better of it. Not only is this very upsetting for me but ironically, the bird he bought in was a hedge sparrow, a bird we have not had in this area for all the fifteen years I have been in this house.

We put bells on their collars and bird food is put on high bird tables that the cats can't actually get onto. I'm not sure what other practical ideas I can come up with.

We went shopping today for a couple of halogen light bulbs for the security lights. We arrived back home having: chosen a potential new carpet for the living room, decided on a complete living room makeover, thought about new light fittings, chosen a couple of bookcases we might like to replace the rickety ones we have now, bought some bathroom fittings to get stuff off the bathroom window sill and six cans of windscreen de-icer.

How the hell do we manage to do these things? I know the answer. Simple minded married men like me are manipulated by very clever women who put their ideas into our heads. They then encourage us to come up with ideas and solutions which match their plans as if they were our ideas - and hey presto! Job done. If you could bottle this stuff, it would be worth a bloody fortune!

We've both had a bit of a tidying rush to our heads around the house and I've even tidied (most) of my computer room which is a rare potential twice a year event. I was wanting a desk top book shelf but I can't find a decent wooden one for less that £45, so I've opted for less attractive very practical office-style bookends. This will allow me instant access to my spiritual material which I keep in a box under my desk. I'm now on the lookout for some ornamental and heavy bookends.

Well this weekend I thought I'd do a sort of a list which isn't exactly a list but it's near enough to a list and it's on one of my favourite subjects, the difference between men and women.

• God made man before woman so man could have time to think about the answer to woman's first question.
• Woman are crazy and men are stupid. Women are crazy because men are stupid.
• Women always want the last word in an argument (mine certainly does!) Anything a man adds after that is a new argument.
• A woman will dress up for going shopping, putting the bin out, answering the phone, doing the gardening, reading a book and having her feet done. A man dresses up for weddings and funerals.
• Men can 'do' their fingernails with a pen knife; keep the same hairstyle for years; have shoes that don't deform their feet; only have to shave their chin; and choose whether or not to grow a moustache!

Discuss.

Enjoy the rest of the weekend.

Chat soon

ta-ra.