Terry's Old Geezers

I like the radio on in the car although I'm not a fan of CDs because I end up concentrating more on skipping tracks I don't like. "Why did you crash sir?" "Because I was giving George Michael the old one-two officer."

In a morning on the way to work, I am treated to a lesson in how to broadcast trivial nonsense with such style and panache so as to be nearly untrue. I am of course talking about 'Wake up to Wogan' on BBC Radio 2, which I catch between 7.30 and 8 am ish. The quality of his prolonged discourse in bollocks coupled with his sardonic irony and sarcasm (enough adjectives?) is unique. I pity the poor 'traffic wench' from the Valleys Lynn Bowles who is the butt of many a jape and witty comment from Terry and his many and varied correspondents (like Chuffer Dandridge, Ivy Noidea, Anne Tique and Ernie Oldiron for example). The innuendo from rhymes sent in from his listeners are subtly cut off before they become bawdy with reference to her parts rhyming with 'bits' or 'flickers'.

Finally the 'Janet and John' series broadcast every now and then with the host Wogan himself reading a story in the genre of Janet and John fully resplendent with characterisations are surely more brilliant and intelligent than the best 'Carry on...' - innuendo of the highest calibre. Many's the time I've laughed so much, I've had to stop the car to wipe the tears from my eyes.

So what is a TOG (Terry's Old Geezers)? I got a 'I am a TOG' car sticker from him once to put on my rear windscreen so traffic wardens would take pity and clampers would hang their heads in shame at the very thought of clamping one of Terry's TOGs. Other bewildered souls seeing the sticker used to bib their horns and put their thumbs up in embarrassed sheepish recognition of a fellow TOG.

Well I suppose a TOG is someone of a certain age with a bewildered air about them and perhaps whose love of common sense and ideals leave them feeling somewhat isolated from the modern get up and go world, ('My get up and go got up and went.')

I suspect if you want to know more, tune in and have a giggle to start the day.

Here's some 'do it' car stickers examples starting with the topical one:

Broadcasters do it with frequency.
Snooker players do it bending over.
Lawyers do it in their briefs.
Disc Jockeys do it on request.
Photographers do it in a flash.
Acupuncturists do it with a small prick.
and finally...
Travel Agents do it in lots of unusual places.

Chat soon

Ta-ra